Tuesday, August 25, 2015

The Green Inferno

Well after years of waiting the Green Inferno is finally on its way out, and the other night i was able to view it at the Bruce Campbell Groovy Film Fest, with an introduction by Eli Roth. Super cool guy, and a great flick. It exceeded my expectations for sure, the characters are likable for the most part, sure they are heavy handed social justice warriors but they are presented in a way where you support them, even if their decisions are stupid at times, Upon being caught by the tribe in Peru the group is offed one by one in gloriously bloody glory, the cheers came loud & often with the deaths, sure they were likable but the film is about the gore, after all it wants to be Cannibal Holocaust, and with all the deaths the film knows how to add in dark humor, but it doesn't halt the impact of the gore & violence we see on the screen. For those of you that think this film pales in comparison to CH, well  yeah, obviously Eli wasn't going to kill animals on film for art, this is 2015, but for a 2015 film, a film that will play in theatres, it pushes the envelope greatly. Thank you Eli Roth for making a film that few could make! You got arguably the best acting out of all your films, possibly the best f/x out of your films, and the best looking film you have made.

Sun Choke

Sun Choke is a well shot film that messes with the nerves for how creepy & fucked up humans can be, it reminds me a bit of May, only not nearly as fucked up. Sarah Hagan from Freaks & Geeks stars as a mentally troubled girl watched over by a mentally abusive Barbara Crampton and is obsessed with Sara Lane. She follows her, breaks into her house, uses her shower, wears her clothes and fucks her boyfriend. She begins to kill & kidnap, and is just all around a crazy bitch. I thought it was good but nothing i would say is must see.

Turbo Kid

Kick Ass meets Mad Max, that is what this film is, and that is a good thing. that is a great thing. THe film is about the Turbo Kid, a huge fan of  comics, but only it is during the apocalypse and he has to hunt to find his comics, he also must hunt to find other  useful goods that he can trade for water & other essentials. He lives on his own after the murders of his parents when he was a kid. With the help of a arm wrestler & a robot he must take down a brute ruler that overseas the wasteland. This has cult film written all over it, the weapons they use, the modes of transportation, the humor, the violence, the blood, the quirkiness, this is an awesome flick.

Bunny the Killer Thing

Take one part Human Centipede, take a 80's sex comedy, put it in a blender with a slasher film and you have Bunny the Killer Thing. This film from Finland is about a man that is kidnapped, and injected with bunny dna, he then goes on a rampage raping anything he passes, why does he rape? I have no clue, though the place does let others come to cum inside other creatures, however this dude was never assaulted but oh well, he & his long dong go on a raping & killing spree at a cabin with some party goers. There is not much for plot but this is a fun flick to watch with your buddies high or drunk,


Body is a new classic christmas horror film, it begins on Christmas Eve's Eve at Mel's(Lauren Molina) house, she is with her two best friends, Holly & Cali(Helen Rogers & Alexandra Turshen) smoking pot, playing games and eating snacks when Cali tells them they should party at her uncles house since he is out of town, now the house may or may not be someone elses house and upon being caught in a place they don't belong, the girls make a huge mistake. Said mistake leads to some real questions, do we cover this up, tell the truth, lie, and shit snowballs from there. The three beauties do a great job acting as does Larry Fessenden as per usual, the tension is great but it also has dashes of humor, humor that actually works. This is a great film, i hope people discover it and love it as much as i did.

Some Kind of Hate

Some Kind Of Hate is billed as a slasher film, and it is, however the film is a slasher that tries too hard to be mean spirited, and by that i don't mean things characters do to each other, all slashers have pricks, but this just does not seem to know how to have fun. It is a well made film and has quite a cool concept, a bullied girl that died at a camp for troubled kids(see Friday the 13th part 5) comes back and takes her vengeance on those bullying a new kid at camp. The way she does so is by cutting herself, every cut on her becomes a cut on her victim. It is a good film but i want my slashers to be films you can watch and clap for the deaths, this film had good deaths but the film is so darkly toned(the bullied emo girl that used to be a cheerleader, the bullied goth metal head) that it almost feels forced.


The other day at the Bruce Campbell Groovy Film Fest i saw a screening of Synapse. Now this is a film i was not too familiar with but the plot was your basic man on the run from a corrupt company for having info. It reminded me alot of a cheap Looper, only instead of JGL trying to kill his future self, it is about a man that got his memories swapped inside to mind of a Synapse Agent(cop). The action is choppy, the plot is uneven and the acting can be wooden at times but i still had a fun time with this flick.

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Sinister 2

I thought the first Sinister was a real gem, many dismissed it but those who saw it, loved it. It had great acting and decent and the films with the film were good and intense. The sequel seems to show more of what happens to the kids during the process, and i like that angle only this film lacks alot that the first had. Unlike the Purge Anarchy that took a great concept that wasn't used in the first, and tossed us into it, Sinister 2 just feels like a straight to video sequel, not that there is anything wrong with that. The character of Ex-Deputy So and So(no joke, i didn't remember his name so i looked it up, totally his name)  is likeable, a bumbling buffoon but a relateable  fella, then there is my love, my baby, Shannyn Sossamon, and she is okay, but she is quite the gorgeous gal. But anyhow, moving on, clean up that sticky spot first, erm, anyways, the film makes you hate her ex husband, a douchey redneck that abuses his kids, the kids, meh, they are what they are. Now the scares are all jump scares, but yet again the films within the film work, they show disturbing shit and feel like snuff films, or as i called it when Sinister came out, August Underground light. There are some damn fine moments, my favorite being the Deputy's hero moment, as i will call it, great pay off. The film is not great but i liked it, i doubt i will revisit it but hey, watch the first one and keep the thought of great theatrical horror alive!

Sunday, August 16, 2015


Zombeavers is a perfect netflix flick, it is a horror comedy, a zombie comedy more specifically, and in doing so it combines sex humor, redneck cliches, felt like it would dabble on pot humor but all we see is a leaf, there are boobs, booze & puns. The beaver's look terrible, the effects are crap but who cares, it is fun as fuck. This a flick you can watch with your buddies with some beers & pizza, you can mock it or you can just enjoy, i mean it isn't so bad it is good, it is just a stupid & fun zombie flick with boobs & blood! What more can you ask for? Likable characters, shut it, you celebrate the deaths, plus the chicks are hot. As for the end, i loved how it looked like a brutal horror film, played the tropes well...then the final shot perfectly book ends the start! Oh yeah and the song over the credits is gold! Bring on Zombees!

Thursday, August 13, 2015

The Stanford Prison Experiment

I had read stories on the Stanford Prison Experiment years ago, then the film with Adrian Brody & Forest Whitaker came out, i loved it, i thought it was awesome, although it was totally done as an action film. I then had the see the original Das Experiment from Germany, basically the same with a few differences here & there, but i preferred the US one overall. Well now here comes the art house version......well sort of art house, the one with more art house cred atleast.....and....it is fucking AMAZING!!!! I loved this film so much, my boy Ezra Miller is fantastic yet again, Hell everyone in this film delivers a knockout, you feel so much pain for the prisoners, you just want to punch the guards, and you find the people running it to be sick.Do characters redeem themselves? Well they try, but you know exactly what they did, now what if the tables were turned and the prisoners were the guards from the beginning and vice versa? Well who knows, human nature is odd, and this film shows it perfectly. It may have been set in the 70s but it feels like a film of the 70s, it has that counter culture, anti authoritarian vibe going on, and it is damn near perfect. If it shows how guards in real prisons treat prisoners, then yes it is sad & pathetic, if it is just an experiment, then it shows how corrupt people can be, but to me, this film shows both.  It is a fucked up flick, with no gore, it is fucked up in the sense of people are dangerous.

Sunday, August 9, 2015

True Detective 2

The first True Detective was southern gothic 101, perfect shit, amazing acting, brilliantly shot, great tension. The second season had big shoes to fill, and while it was not as good as the first, it was still a great season. Colin Farrell stole the show on this, his character had a great heart but his temper fucked him over, the shit with his son was almost heartbreaking. Vince Vaughn seemed almost like Vincent D'Onofrio on Daredevil, but unlike D'Onofrio he did not receive raving reviews. To that i say bs, Vaughn was solid this season, i hope he gets more serious roles again, underrated actor. Taylor Kitsch is usually rather wooden, here he showed better chops than he usually has, plus he was the most human. Rachel McAdams does a 1 2 punch with this & Southpaw, was super sexy aswell. The plot was not as tight as the first but it had almost a Twin Peaks esque vibe with the surreal shit going on, almost like a bad trip. This here was a solid season, it had its shock moments for sure but it still lacked compared to the first. The finale had some pacing issues here & there but overall it wrapped shit up nice, it ended on more of a down note which i did enjoy, the end with McAdams was left open and that too i thought was good, the unknown future.

The Gift

So The Gift is that happens when you take a plot that should be on lifetime and add in a super high creepy factor. The film keeps you uneased the entire run, the director, Joel Edgerton also plays Gordo, the old classmate of Jason Bateman's Simon, and from the moment we meet him, he is Straight Outta Creepton. He gives Gifts(spoilers), he shows up at odd times, breaks in, he lies about his job & family, and seems to   be highly unstable, well we found out why through out the film. Now he may have been fucked up before running into Simon in high school but Simon exacerbated his problems, you see Simon is Straight Outta Assholeton, and it shows from the moment we meet him. This is a yuppy ass bitch that you want to see get put in his place. His wife is super sweet but Straight Outta Naiveton. It moves at a great pace and seems to be inspired by Italian & French horror, but at the core it is still a Lifetime movie, an arthouse Lifetime movie, not that it seems like an art film, but come one, fuck Lifetime, i am trying to praise this  film.....Creepy Lifetime! Well alot of Lifetime is creepy but they blow dogs for quarters, this here, does not. The acting is great and it builds suspense well, even if it does use jum scares, but the brilliant thing is, it knows it is toying with the audience, plus it trolls us by having an open ended finale.

Fantastic 4

So Roger Corman tried to produce a version in the 90's, and well it was terrible, look it up online. Then Fox produced two in the 00's,  well they were awful, only saving grace is the Silver Surfer, but that was even pushing it, that is like saying the second time you puked was better than the first time. Well since that time, the Marvel Cinematic Universe has taken off, and Fox wanted to cash in to create their own universe....the results, are fucking AWESOME, i mean come on, Days of Future Past was the shit, Quicksilver? Badass! Oh then Fox decided to have the Fantastic 4 join the ranks.....oh yeah, fuck you! God this sucked, Miles Teller was decent in the first half, then he seemed lost in the second. Toby Kebbell as Dr. Doom was interesting, too bad his vilain aspect was rushed, as was his final battle. I mean come on, the plot was fucked, how did Sue Storm get affected but no one else there did? Why did Reed become a huge pussy? Why was that subplot even brought in? Doom killing folks Scanners style, okay, i dig it, but him just wanting to go back to the other dimension? Let him, for all we know he may not have been wanting to suck Earth there, if they did address that in the film, then okay, it would still feel forced. The clobbering time line? Which one? Both, ugh the 2007 scene with Ben's older brother was stupid, the line the Thing gives when he punches out Doom was fantastically weak. You know what, this would be cool, have David Cronenberg make a body horror version of the Fantastic Four....well maybe not, but someone should, someday. Would never get greenlit but come on, body horror yo!

REC Series ranked

I finally saw Rec 4, so here is the franchise ranked.

Rec 3.
This one may not be the same sub genre as the first two but it is batshit crazy, from begining to end, over the top & full of gore.

Rec 2.
Fits more in line with the first one but this one goes for the jugular from the start.

Had it been released a few years later, it would have been an after thought in found footage but this one sticks out, i love the first three.

Rec 4.
This one doesn't suck but it did not live up to the first 3 at all, it has its moments but overall i was disapointed by it

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Mission Impossible Franchise ranked

For almost 20 years Ethan Hunt has been taking us on Impossible Missions let us look back at the best of the franchise.

1. Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol.
This film had the best development of characters, the best chemistry, and it looked like everyone was having a blast on the set. Funny that a animation director in Brad Bird would deliver the best action of the entire franchise. Plus it has one of my favorite openings in action movies, the way it cuts into the theme song felt so organic & kick ass.

2. Mission Impossible 3
This is the film that made me a fan of the franchise, JJ Abrams brought me into it with his show Lost, but the franchise took on a new life ever since Bad Robot became the production company plus it has the best villain in the series with Phillip Seymour Hoffman, oh plus Simon Pegg in it for the first time!

3. Rogue Nation
This one may not be the best shot or have the best villains but it is a close second the the first &  third respectively on that front. Ghost Protocol may still be the funnest entry but this one is just as fun, i think the main reason it does not dethrone it, is because alot of the film is super contrived.

4. Mission Impossible
This one has grown on me, it is very much a Brian De Palma film, his stamp is all over it, and it is a tad cheesy too. Possibly the best shot of the series!

5. Mission Impossible 2
John Woo put his mark all over this film, it is action movie goodness and it's most bang & pow atleast for early 00's cinema.

Sunday, August 2, 2015

Wet Hot American Summer

When Reno 911 came out i became aware of a comedy troupe known as the State, as soon as Comedy Central played Wet Hot American Summer i fell in love. To me, to this day it is the second funniest film ever made, right behind Anchorman. 14 years later we get the series, and thank you Netflix for doing so! The show is a gift to the fans, the basis for certain characters, the arkcs the connected characters, and most importantly the soul & heart of the film are alive & well, this show was well worth it. I usually do not binge watch shows, but i devoted 4 hours for this glorious occasion. From the opening credits i was celebrating the fact that instead of 8 half hour episodes, it felt like a 4 hour long film, a 4 hour long film with no pacing issues. The hours flew by as we watched Coop try to chase his "girlfriend" be toyed with and almost try a threesome, all to catch the eye of Katie. We watched Katie gain the affection of Andy which started a war between Camp Firewood & Camp Tigerclaw. We saw Victor show his virginity & Neil lose his, we saw Ben & McKinley fall in love, Gene & Gail fall out of love and see Gail fall for Ron. We saw the can of vegetables die as a human and respawn, we saw the Beekeeper never bathe, we saw Beth & Henry begin something special, we saw Lindsay become a teen after being an adult and Abby get her period into womanhood, Steve got more screentime plus JJ, Gary & Susie all got their spots as well did plenty of new comers into the fold, the bit parts were great, Jon Hamm, Chris Pine, Jason Schwartzman Kristen Wiig, Randall Park, Lake Bell, Michael Cera, Rob Huebel(in a small part), and Weird Al were all awesome. The sight gags & word play were top notch and did not disappoint me one bit, this universe is right up my Community loving alley. I hope for a second season that shows what they all do at 9:30 10 years later!